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"Everybody Loves A Clone"

Did you ever buy a new car 
and suddenly you see others just like it all over the place? 
Well, I'm that way with people. 

If some morning 
I notice a resemblance between the bus driver and Lyndon Johnson, 
then it's a Johnson day. 
80% of the individuals I run into for the rest of the day 
will look like LBJ, 
men, women, and children. 
Unless you've seen Johnson as a baby in a buggy, 
you have no idea what I go through! 
And the mothers look like him, too. 
It drives me nuts! 

I saw a guy who looked like J. Edgar Hoover, 
walking his dog. 
You know how people look like their pets? 
Well, you should have seen what was on the other end of that leash! 
The rest of the day was one big Hoover family reunion. 

Today it could be Hitlers, 
tomorrow Little Orphan Annies. 

I have my politically incorrect episodes, 
when racial characteristics are the mode of the day. 
Monday could be all Polish, 
and Tuesday all Indians. 
I've seen it rain Greeks for days. 

After studying this phenomenon carefully, 
I've narrowed the possibilities down to this: 
There are aliens among us 
who are up to no good. 

I slipped out the back door and down to the corner. 
There they were, 
acting nonchalant, 
pretending they didn't see me. 

They get bolder as they grow in number. 
This morning I was the only person in Walmart 
who didn't look like Regis Philbin. 

I don't know where to turn, 
now that the cops are all Hillary Clintons, 
so I'm locking the doors, 
and putting the dog out. 
(That dog is starting to look suspiciously like Buck Owens.) 

If any remaining humans read this, 
please send help. 
I'm in the brick house on the corner, 
and everybody around here looks like George W. Bush. 

Copyright  April 18, 2003 Jack Blanchard. All rights reserved. 


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